Breaking roots and growing new ones someplace else.

My whole sentient life seems like it has been a neverending series of instances where I realize that I'm a few cunt hairs away from one negative extreme or another. Is that what my life is? just fending off disaster day to day? Every time someone pisses me off or gets in my business for no reason I have to decide yes or no. Do I "yes" knee-jerk and immediately beat on their face until it becomes concave? or do I continue living with little or no incident.. repeating the cycle every day, several times a day until I'm too weak to be able to decide? It makes you wonder.. if every human on this earth dealt with their anger immediately instead of repressing, would it be better or worse? There would certainly be less people, as a matter of course.. that in itself would be better for whatever population remained as well as the planet and everything else that lives on it. The world would be a very violent place for awhile, but the populace would be weaned, and those left would be forced to think very differently about everything. Wouldn't that be better than a massively bloated population of sentient beings who delude and constrain themselves everyday to fit into society.. a construct.. an artificial institution that erodes nature in virtually every capacity. When you think the same for too long.. even to preserve a seemingly harmonious society, your mindset stagnates. Sometimes, doing something different, even if it hurts or seems destructive.. is all that can save the life of whatever that enduring thought was created to protect. Sometimes breaking the pattern is ultimately more important than the pattern itself.